top of page

Are You Sabotaging Your Relationship with Your Adult Children? The Shocking Truth about Sharenting and Its Impact

In today's digital age, the phenomenon of "sharenting" - where parents share news, images, and videos of their children online - has skyrocketed. This is when parents share news, images, and videos of their children on social media. While it often comes from a place of love and excitement, this trend can unintentionally create a rift between you and your adult children. Have you considered how your seemingly innocent posts impact your relationships? Let’s explore the hidden effects of sharenting on family dynamics.



Understanding Sharenting: A Double-Edged Sword


While sharenting is not new, but it has intensified with the rise of platforms like Instagram and Facebook. Parents often share milestones, updates, or everyday moments with the best intentions. For example, a mom might post pictures of her daughter’s graduation or a dad might share a video of his son’s first golf swing. However, in a world where privacy is increasingly valuable, what seems like harmless sharing can lead to uncomfortable situations.


Studies show that 70% of young adults feel anxious or uncomfortable with their parents' online sharing habits. What they might see as joyful moments may feel like an invasion of their personal space. Once adult children transition into adulthood, they seek independence, and constantly being showcased online might counteract their efforts to establish a sense of self.


The Impact of Oversharing


When parents overshare about their grown children, feelings like disrespect and a violation of boundaries can arise. For instance, if a parent frequently posts about their child’s relationship status or career struggles, it can lead to resentment.


Adult children want autonomy over their narrative. According to a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center, nearly 60% of respondents indicated they prefer to control how their stories are told, especially on social media. If you continuously post about their lives without permission, they may feel like they are limited to the role of a character in a story they didn’t approve.


Boundaries: The Key to Healthy Relationships


Establishing boundaries around social media sharing is crucial for a healthy relationship. Open conversations about what is acceptable to share help foster trust. Before posting about your adult child's life, start a dialogue.


For instance, you might ask, "How do you feel about me sharing pictures from our family vacation on Facebook?" By involving them in the decision-making process, you are showing that you respect their choices. This respect can strengthen your relationship in the long run.


The Risks of Digital Responsibility


Maintaining digital responsibility is vital in today's interconnected world. Many parents may not realize that online posts can have lasting implications.


For example, if a child applies for jobs and potential employers find old posts about their personal life, it might impact their chances of landing a position. Job recruiters have reported that over 70% actively check social media profiles before making hiring decisions. Ask yourself: are you willing to risk your child's professional opportunities due to oversharing?




How to Navigate the Sharenting Dilemma


Navigating the sharenting issue requires a blend of love, respect, and awareness. Here are a couple of practical strategies to maintain that delicate balance:


  • Communicate Openly: Maintain consistent dialogue with your adult children. Ask them how they feel about your social media usage and genuinely listen to their thoughts.


  • Set Criteria for Sharing: Work together to define what is appropriate to share. Agreeing on this can create peace and minimize misunderstandings.



When unsure about posting, it’s better to pause. Consider their privacy and feelings first. Also, share your own experiences rather than constantly focusing on their achievements or challenges.


The Generation Gap: A Cultural Shift


Parents and adult children often have different views on digital communication. For many parents, social media is a fun way to connect and engage. However, for young adults, or adult children raising their family, the stakes are higher. They often worry about the implications of what is shared.


A significant cultural shift has occurred where adult children are more alert to the risks of online exposure. Understanding this generational perspective can foster a healthier family dynamic.


Choosing Connection Over Content


In the end, prioritizing connection over content is crucial for strong relationships with your adult children.


Making an effort to respect their boundaries not only prevents tension but encourages them to share their lives with you on their terms. This open communication can lead to meaningful conversations and a deeper connection.


Eye-level view of a quiet park bench surrounded by trees
Family fun

Moving Forward in a Digital Age


Sharenting may seem common in our digital world, but it is essential to understand its potential effects on family relationships.


By talking openly about boundaries, respecting your adult children's need for privacy, and being mindful of your online sharing, you can create a nurturing and supportive atmosphere.


As you navigate the challenges of modern parenting, remember that your relationship with your adult children is the most meaningful post you could ever share.


Close-up view of a diary with a pen resting on it
Three generations

In the context of sharenting, opt for understanding over oversharing to watch your relationships flourish.




References

  • Livingstone, S. (2018). Children's online safety: A global perspective on the risks and opportunities of digital media. Oxford University Press.

  • Stiglic, N., & Viner, R. M. (2019). Effects of screentime on the health and well-being of children and adolescents: A systematic review. BMJ Open.

  • Hersh, E. (2020). The impact of social media on family relationships: A review of the literature. Journal of Family Issues.

  • O'Keeffe, G. S., & Clarke-Pearson, K. (2011). The impact of social media on children, adolescents, and families. Pediatrics.

  • Boyd, D. (2014). It's Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens. Yale University Press.

Comments


© 2023 

bottom of page